MUSHY'S MOOCHINGS: SO LONG NIGEL

Thursday, March 06, 2008

SO LONG NIGEL

G'day mates, ya wan’a have a par'ee? Well, it’s not a real par'ee, is mor lik’a autopsy!

Look at the pretty little hand with its festooned nails on the right and tell me if you think they could cut up a pet’s dead little body and perform an autopsy to determine the cause of death!?

You’ve heard me say that Katie Bug has a high interest in forensic investigation and other things relating to medicine, so it may not come to you as much of a shock to learn that she can, in fact, take a knife to something she once loved!

She came home the other day to find that her Gecko, Nigel, had succumbed to the ill effects of living in the wilds of a cage with a sandy floor. Instead of fretting over it much, she promptly takes a razor blade from the bathroom and commences to lay the little bugger open! With every motion of the blade and organ discovery, she gives a blow-by-blow account to her mother, who is by now astonished and cowering in a corner at the scene on the kitchen table, and saying supportive things like, “Eewww!

Katie laid out the heart and lungs, the intestines – both the long and short of them, and then opens the stomach, describing in full detail to her mother. Ah, a pure case of dehydration,” she announces!

And how do you know that,” Tracy asks from behind the hands covering her eyes?

Simple mom, the stomach is full of sand…dry sand…duh, no water!”

Just then Eddie walks into the room and Tracy says, “Do you know what you’re daughter is doing?

I’m doing an autopsy on Nigel…he died,” Katie tells him matter-of-factly. “What do you want me to do with him?”

Just put’em in the trash, I’ve got to take it off anyway,” Eddie says shaking his head. He walks out of the room with that proud little smile on his face that says, “She’s just like me!

Her Granny and I got a full account last night during American Idol…this is the second time she’s spent the night with us this week. What have we done to deserve this blessing?!

11 comments:

Hammer said...

I gave up autopsies in 9th grade biology.

Now who forgot to water Nigel?

Buck said...

I'm with Katie's Mom... "Ewww" would have been MY reaction, too. I barely made it through high school biology where I was... ummm... "privileged" to dissect a frog. Not one of my favorite Moments in Education.

But: Good on Her! We need folks like her in life. Someone has to do this stuff, eh?

My verification word: gagcnz. Which is sorta the sound I made while reading this. ;-)

~Fathairybastard~ said...

I think that's friggin' hilarious! Good for her. Sounds like she knows what she wants and already has the detachment to be able to get it done without a lot of silly crap gettin' in the way. Now, if it was a beloved pet cat, or your dog, I'd be thinkin'... Jeffrey Dahmer started this way, didn't he?

Mushy said...

I asked her if she was going to do the same when Molly, her dog, died, and, like her mom, she said Eewww!

So, she is selective in her detachment!

Jose said...

What have we done to deserve this blessing?!

I am sure you have given her your love, she is just letting you know how much she appreciates you guys.

Mushy said...

She stayed again last night...a true blessing.

Suldog said...

She is just waaaaay too cute to be chopping up geckos. When she's got someone ready to go to the altar, don't let him know she does reptile autopsies until after the vows.

BRUNO said...

At least it wasn't a damned snake---no autopsy would be necessary, there!

Scott from Oregon said...

A desert for a meal for Nigel, huh?

Ewww... er... uh... too cool!

Becky said...

Sounds like she's made for medicine or forensics. I couldn't do the dissections in biology without gagging every few seconds.

catscratch said...

I had a real interest in Forensics, for about a minute.
When I turned pale and nearly passed out during A&P cadaver studies I knew I was clawing up the wrong tree!