ON SETTLERS RIDGE

It was Katie Bug’s birthday this week and she decided that the family should celebrate the occasion in Gatlinburg, sitting high atop a mountain top! So, that’s what happened. Wednesday morning we all woke up bright and early and started the 80 mile trip.

Me, well, I woke up dizzy…hadn’t been drinkin’ either…inner ear trouble I suppose. Anyway, I fought it all day Wednesday, even driving a couple of 40 mile per hour go-carts! One of the suckers put me through quite a “G” force battle on turn 3, leaving my right thigh a little sore from my mass being forced into it. However, it was a slick-track and you don’t let up on a slick-track…it’s peddle to the metal and you slide the corners, and I would gently scrap the wall before hitting the straightaway! It was cool as heck for a fat boy to be scooting along and passing “old” people! I even t-boned one young dude that spun out in front of me…BAM!

But, I get ahead of myself! We killed time before checking in at the cabin by driving up to Ober Gatlinburg and letting everyone, everyone but me, ice skate…I was too unstable for falling on my butt on wet ice! Judy walked herself around the rink holding on to the rail, and I sat above and took pictures, with my finger on the movie mode just in case a YouTube moment happened!

Katie and Zack rode the Alpine Slide down the mountain while the rest of us tried to cool off with water and soft serve! Tracy got a kick out of how fast I can inhale a soft serve! I hate melted ice cream, so, I just start licking and sucking in as I rotate the cone…soon it’s gone and I’m cool! Not cool in how it looks for a full-grown man to be making sucking noises with his tongue sticking out, but like cool inside!

Afterwards, we made our way back toward Pigeon Forge, and up to Settler’s Ridge to the cabin called Perfection! It was too! Located just right to see the mountains to the south of Pigeon Forge, and it had everything you could want in a cabin for 6 people. A beautiful view, three bedrooms (and 3 couches for Zack to chose from), 3 baths, a game room with pool table, Foose ball, and a pin-ball machine, a huge kitchen and dinning room, a computer room, 6 wide-screen TVs…one in the master bath and all with Dish TV hookups, a Jacuzzi, and lots of outside deck space with rocking chairs! If I could afford it…I’d live there…no wait…the drive up and down would be hell in the winter! Maybe not…maybe I’ll just stay right here.

That evening we did go for the go-carts, which were, besides the family, the high light of my trip!

Later we went to the Alamo Steakhouse Restaurant and chowed down! Katie ordered a t-bone and said it was the best steak she had ever eaten! Judy and I split a fried shrimp and a shrimp wrapped bacon dish and thoroughly enjoy it. I was not feeling my best and the taste of beef was just not on my list of foods I wanted that night.

Before going back up the mountain, we stopped at MagiQuest for Katie and Zack, but Judy and Tracy decided to join them inside the attraction. Eddie and I sat in the lobby talking and watch the people inside on a monitor. We then used another tag off our “ParkHopper Pass” brackets to ride go-carts at another track. Then it was time to go back to the cabin.

Sometime early in the morning I got very sick and threw up several times…I was out of it for the rest of Thursday. I was weak and dizzy all day, and spent most of the day in bed. (I should point out that it was not from bad food…there was no food in what came up ! It may be that I’m developing a gall bladder issue…we’ll see. )

So, Thursday afternoon, the rest of the family left me in bed and went back off the mountain to continue their fun. I insisted Judy go and told her I would be fine. Around 1AM Friday morning, the group woke me up. They had closed Gatlinburg and other parts of the mountain at Murder Mystery Theater and playing Black Light Golf! Me, I had slept most of the day, and after they settled in for the rest of what was left of the night, I went back to sleep!

This morning I seemed to have my balance back and after a pancake and egg breakfast I was feeling pretty good. Judy decided she had better drive back, but only made it to I-40 where she had to pull over from fighting sleep! I drove from there home, with Judy only waking up for the last 11 minutes of the ride! Good thing I drove!

Tomorrow we are invited out on the Charlotte and Gary’s party boat, but I think Judy will make the trip by herself. I’m in no shape for any wave action on Watts Bar Lake right now.

Thanks to Katie’s birthday wish, we all enjoyed each other in the Smoky Mountains, which is just in our backdoor. We should go there more often, and probably would if so many of you folks didn’t also like it enough to go there. Gets too crowded for me at certain times of the year and I hate bumper to bumper traffic! Let me know when you’re not going and maybe I’ll try it again soon!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KATIE…and thanks!

DAY TWO – DENISE AND JEFF IN TENNESSEE

Wednesday morning began at 8:30 down by the Emory River in Harriman. Ron met us (Denise, Jeff, and me) with his canoe and kayak, and took them up stream as far as the river would allow, ending at the shallow rapids about an hour away.

I sat, well…I really laid back, read my new Cormac McCarthy book and took a short nap! It wasn’t long before Jeff and Denise came paddling around the bend and into sight, with Ron just behind.

After beaching the boats, Jeff decided he needed to try out Ron’s kayak, but soon understood that kayaks are for little fellers!

Just like the day before, Jeff showed off his lung capacity by sucking on a stogie while working out with the paddle. Me…well, I’d have to have oxygen hooked up! The day before on the hike, I suddenly smelled smoke and noticed that while I was laboring for air, Jeff was walking calmly along toking on his cigar! I was impressed!

Around 1PM Judy and I headed out for Gatlinburg, going in the back way through Townsend, TN, and showing the beautiful drive through the Smoky Mountains and into the south side of Gatlinburg.

We first rode the “Sky Lift” up the mountain to get a grand view of the little valley where Gatlinburg is nestled. Then Jeff wanted to see the celebrity cars at “Star Cars”, while Judy and Denise shopped.

We then got tickets for the ski tram that takes you to “Ober Gatlinburg”. It was fun watching Denise as the tram moved up the mountain at a steady 17 mph…she’s a bit uneasy with heights! She and Jeff rode the “Pirate Ship” in the mountain top amusement park; Jeff had to cut it short since the sensation was just a bit too much for her.

We then settled down to a couple of nice “normal” Yuenglings, while Denise converted Judy to her “Shandy”. She even intrigued me enough that I tasted of it…not bad, but I like “real” beer taste!

Back down the mountain, we went decided to drop a hundred dollars or so each at “The Peddler”! They come by the table with a large slab of ribeye and New York strip steak, and you get to guide the “peddler’s” hand as he cuts you custom slice of juicy steak! I was so filled by the salad bar that I had to get a “to go box” for over half my steak and baked potato!

We didn’t get back to Harriman until around 10 PM, so since they planned to leave Thursday, we wanted them to get plenty of sleep. Well, we woke this morning to the good news that they were staying an extra day!

More about the extra day soon…

I’m sure Jeff will be a lot more descriptive of his travels once he gets back and catches up!