MUSHY'S MOOCHINGS: CONFESSIONS OF A TRAFFIC WHORE!

Friday, October 27, 2006

CONFESSIONS OF A TRAFFIC WHORE!

“Hi. My name is Mushy, and I’m a “traffic whore” (sobbing).

It all started innocently enough – I registered my blog URL on blogexlosion (don’t click on the embedded link or you’re doomed) and began to play their silly little “Blog Rocket” and “Surf Member Blogs” games. Soon I had accumulated points and began to wager on “Battle of the Blogs” and doing “ScratchCards.” To my surprise I began to win and as of a few days ago I was the 14th top blog challenge winner of the month – rated 274 overall with over 1400 points! I was hooked and my hit counters were clicking away – driving me forward, telling me to “Explode your BLOG traffic.” Now, I’m purposely trying to lose all my points!

I began to lose weight (writer’s license to exaggerate here), miss my favorite TV shows (Ugly Betty, Desperate Housewives, and Greg’s Anatomy (more license use)), and lay awake at night plotting strategy (this is actually true)!

As of today, both my blog counters say I’m over 10,000 hits, and God I feel so cheap I can’t even celebrate! Worse of all, I’ve cheated my readership. Seeing that a site has that many hits compels readers, who would not normally give me time enough to click through, to stop, and read just to see what they may have been missing.

“Hi. My name is Mushy, and I’m a “traffic whore” (still blubbering).

Today I ordered T-shirts from Zazzle with my picture on the front and my blog address front and back – oh God help me to do better.

“Hi. My name is Mushy, and I’m a “traffic whore” (sniffling).

Today I ordered “Blogness Cards” from VistaPrint with my picture and blog address and a cute little comment under my “real” name – is there no hope.

So, now…now I’m on the wagon. I promise from this point on I’ll increase my hit count the old fashion way – one reader at a time – the slow legitimate way. I’ll visit blogs and leave comments, true heart felt comments, and maybe I’ll win a new friend or two.

I don’t feel too bad however, SiteMeter says readers average 2.34 minutes a visit and I try to keep most of my post within that anyway. So maybe you are reading – “You do love me!” (talk like Sally Field while reading this part). Another good sign is that I’ve swapped links with over 20 FRIENDS, and honestly, if no one but them ever read my blog again I’ll be happy. The best I can do now is “stay on the wagon” and keep up their interest.

I suppose 10,000 was a magical number I wanted to reach to give me some since of legitimacy to my blogging. The sad truth is I was too blind to see that my Blogrolled FRIENDS was all the legitimacy I ever needed. Thanks friends, and if I have not linked someone, please let me know.

This is what I do…pass on lessons learned - from a reformed “sixties” kind of man.

“Hi. My name is Mushy, and I’m a “traffic whore” (head held high).

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Blogging one post at a time;
Enjoying each hit at a time;
Accepting negative comments as the pathway to growth;
Taking, as Ron and the Goddess do, this blogging world as it is,
not as I would have it;
Trusting that hits will come even if I don’t surrender to the darkside;
That I may be reasonably happy in cyberspace
and supremely happy with simple blogging -Without BlogExplosion.
Amen.

23 comments:

Templar said...

Lol....a fellow troubled soul...It has been 3 days since my last explosion but I am off the wagon.

Suzi said...

Hey, I'm glad you joined BE, because that's how I found you yesterday! I don't play the games anymore, but I still surf to find new blogs. Sometimes I find a gem, like yours!

DirtCrashr said...

I understand the compulsion, that's why I resist. Besides I'm lazy.

Sodapop said...

LOL that was an awesome post Mushy! And so right on!!!

Ron Southern said...

I notice people mention Blogexplosion sometimes, but my feeling about it was about as you have summarized it. I'd noticed that your blog took off from 5,000 to 10,000 in about the time that mine increased very little. I thought you were just popular, I didn't know you were just a--well, you know, the W word! But, it's hard to have any pretence to having Integrity, no matter who we are. There's always somebody smaller than us! And always a faster gun.

Mel said...

Well I found your blog from Battle of the Blogs and I am grateful, I read you almost every day (I do have to work and that darn work cuts into my blog time!)!

Your son is so cute. I know what you mean about them getting older but you still think of them as little kids.

Carol said...

Hey! Thanks for the visit and comment. I love your post - and I'm a traffic whore as well. I impulsively BOUGHT points on BE - and now I must spend them as quickly as possible in order to put this compulsion behind me. I usually don't even look to see who is battling me - I just make a challenge and as soon as it's over make another one. I usually lose. . . LOL!

Becky said...

Congratulations on becoming the ultimate whore:) YOu realize that one can only mean that as a compliment in the blogosphere, right?

Mushy said...

Templar - Bless you my son and do 5 ScratchCards!

Suzi - I too will continue to surf, but IF I can lose these points, I'll stop the games. I keep winning! Strange, when you don't care it comes easy.

Dirtcrashr - I'm gonna get lazy too.

SodaPop & Mel - found you two there too, so it ain't all bad.

Ron - How true and I think I remember you warning me a long time back. I should listen to my guru!

Carol - I'm battling blind too, but having more luck now than ever. I'll go up against the biggies...so it won't last long.

And finally my pal Becky - Thanks. From you I understand and take it standing up!

Fathairybastard said...

Man, this stuff is like crack if you let it be. I have to turn it off to get school shit done and sleep. Find myself going whole weeks between posts, where I used to feel guilty somehow if I didn't post something every day. Gotta have a life. Love the post though, and the pictures.

Goddess said...

I joined SWA (Stat Whores Anonymous) when I realized I had a problem, but dude! Even I don't have a t shirt with my site addy on it!

Mushy said...

Ain't it cool!

jan said...

That was truly inspirational. You are a role model for us all. Perhaps there is hope for me, I am a Google whore. There I said it. I feel so free.

I've found you and many neat blogs on B.E. Rocket.

Mushy said...

Thanks Jan - glad I found you too.

I surprised no on has commented on the sunglasses...click and enlarge and look for Mushy in the lens!

The first one to comment was going to win a big money prize too!

Gabriela said...

Hi

Thanks for commenting on my blog. I really appreciate it.

About your post, I know about the battle of the blogs. I'm not a big winner, sometimes I win, sometimes I lose. But it's still fun to do.

I still have a few readers, but considering that I started out without readers, I think it's pretty cool.

Come visit me again anytime. =)

XoXo
Gaby

bozette said...

I will always read your blog no matter what. I love to hear what you have to say. I love your pics. Most of all I love who you are.
Okay I will shut up now.
Have a good one my friend.

CyberCelt said...

Funny! You should get a traffic whore mascot for your site like the QueerChef has the Comment Whore.

http://www.queerchef.com/?cat=12

I love the redone serenity prayer.

Marie said...

If you want to sign up with BlogMad make sure you click through on MY link! :)

I like surfing for credits 'cause I like to read, anyway.

bozette said...

I love the shades where can I get some with your picture on them.
LMAO

Fathairybastard said...

Man, I think that's just more Mushy than God ever intended. The glasses kill me.

Jose said...

Bueno, bueno, bueno, su blog esta muy bonito y yo lo leo todos los dias.

Did you ever expect to have spanish speaking readers? You have one now. Awesome post, funny as heck too.

Mushy said...

Thanks for all the great comments - I love ya all!

Yeah...too much Mushy for even me!

Jose...no, I did not. I'm just ashamed I'm a lazy gringo who barely knows one language well. Mostly, it's East Tennessee, which is a language all it's own!

phlegmfatale said...

so far, I'm resisting the urge to click on that link... for now.